I received word early that my dear friend had lost his fight to cancer at 7:30 this morning.

My heart broke.

I cried.

I cried for his family that has fought so hard these last 18 months.

I cried for his dear wife who has done everything to care for him and her family. I have watched her these last weeks and have been amazed at her love, her determination, her courage, and her faith.

I cried for their son who is serving his mission and the personal battles he will fight.

And then selfishly I cried for myself.

He was my friend.

He would massage my shoulders before church and save my children's lives through sacrament meeting. I remember one time Tyler turned to me after the sacrament was over and asked if he could take the twins out and beat them. Kirt leaned forward, placed his hand on Tyler's shoulder, smiled, and laughingly said no. He whispered to us to enjoy the time that our children are little, the good and the bad. He would tell us if they had been bad enough for a beating.

I will miss him sitting behind us and playing with our children.

I will miss him rubbing Van's head.

I will greatly miss visiting with him under our shade tree each day as he finished his walk.

I will miss him.

I had this sticker made a few weeks ago. I cried as I put it on the tile this morning, I will likely cry when I take it to their family tonight.

But I will also cry tears of joy.

Joy in knowing that I will see him again, joy in the great plan of our Heavenly Father, and joy in friendship.